I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
