if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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