Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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