We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
