i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
