dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
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He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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