super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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