You work out of a Hotel?
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
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