why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
