i think my mom watched the whole time
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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