So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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