Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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