Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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