Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
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I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
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Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.