You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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