i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
