so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I need to calm my uterus...
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
