Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
