i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
she peed on how many people?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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