We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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