oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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