Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
