took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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