I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
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