We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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