Kiss
Puke
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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