can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Randomize