Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
