i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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