"it" just moved
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
