That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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