Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
