so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
