I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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