My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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