you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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