I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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