"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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