Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
