And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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