I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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