I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I just gift wrapped bread.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
