i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
