She's JV to your varsity
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
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The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
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Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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