Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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