Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize