"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
