I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
