I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
