Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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