I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
i think i just lost a toe
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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