Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Who died my cat blue again?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
